· FICTIONARY (fic shun ary)
n. A collection of made up, or archaic words
· PORCULENT (pork u lent)
adj. As fat as a Pig
· HURL (hurl)
· URP (urp)
n. & vt. vomit
(hurl ay shus)
(urp ay shus)
· GAGACIOUS (gag ay shus)
· BUNKIN (bun kin)
· FRISBEETARIANISM (friz be tery a' nizm)
n. The belief that when you die, your
soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck
· PITYEST (pit i est)
adj. The most pitiful
· GLEEMITES (gle' mites)
n. Petrified deposits of toothpaste found in sinks
· VOWELITIS (vowl i tis)
n. The condition you get when you have next to no consonants
· ACCORDIONATED (ah kor' de on ay tid)
adj. Being able to drive and refold a road
map at the same time.
· AQUADEXTROUS (ak wa deks' trus)
adj. Possessing the ability to turn the bathtub
faucet on and off with your toes.
· AQUALIBRIUM (ak wa lib' re um)
n. The point where the stream of drinking fountain
water is at its perfect height, thus relieving the drinker from (a) having to suck the nozzle, or (b) squirting himself in
the eye (or ear).
· BURGACIDE (burg' uh side)
n. When a hamburger can't take any more torture and
hurls itself through the grill into the coals.
· BUZZACKS (buz' aks)
n. People in phone marts who walk around picking up display
phones and listening for dial tones even when they know the phones are not connected.
· CARPERPETUATION (kar' pur pet u a shun)
adj. The act, when vacuuming, of running
over a string or a piece of lint at least a dozen times, reaching over and picking it up, examining it, then putting it back
down to give the vacuum one more chance.
· DIMP (dimp)
n. A person who insults you in a cheap department store by asking,
"Do you work here?"
· DISCONFECT (dis kon fect')
v. To sterilize the piece of candy you dropped on the
floor by blowing on it, somehow assuming this will remove all the germs.
· ECNALUBMA (ek na leb' ma)
n. A rescue vehicle which can only be seen in the rear
· EIFFELITES (eye' ful eyetz)
n. Gangly people sitting in front of you at the movies
who, no matter which direction you lean in, follow suit.
· ELBONICS (el bon icks')
n. The actions of two people maneuvering for one armrest
in a movie theater.
· ELECELLERATON (el a cel er ay' shun)
n. The mistaken notion that the more you
press an elevator button the faster it will arrive.
· FRUST (frust)
n. The small line of debris that refuses to be swept onto the dust
pan and keeps backing a person across the room until he finally decides to give up and sweep it under the rug.
· LACTOMANGULATION (lak to man gyu lay' shun)
v. Manhandling the "open here" spout
on a milk container so badly that one has to resort to the illegal side.
· NEONPHANCY (ne on' fan see)
n. A fluorescent light bulb struggling to come to
· PEPPIER (pehp ee ay')
n. The waiter at a fancy restaurant whose sole purpose seems
to be walking around asking diners if they want ground pepper.
· PETROPHOBIC (pet ro fob' ik)
adj. One who is embarrassed to undress in front of
a household pet.
· PHONESIA (fo nee' zhuh)
n. The affliction of dialing a phone number and forgetting
whom you were calling just as they answer.
· PUPKUS (pup kus')
n. The moist residue left on a window after a dog presses it's
nose to it.
· TELECRASTINATION (tel e kras tin ay' shun)
n. The act of always letting the phone
ring at least twice before you pick it up, when you're only six inches away.
· DOCSNEERIC (docks near ik)
adj. The feeling you get
when your physician starts to bore you.
· MAGNOSPUTE (mag no spute)
n. That small mucous ball that builds up in back of
your throat during an MRI.
· KNOBHOLLOW (nob hol oh)
n. A small hole or depression in the pavement.
· KNOBHOLLOWED (nob hol oh ed)
adj. That horrid moment when your cane goes in a
· CROCKERASTINATION (croc er ast in ay shun)
adj. The feeling of relief when you
manage to get the cup off the saucer despite your shaking hand.
· ELEPOCK (elly poc)
n. The small pinkish mark left by an EEG electrode
· ELEPOCKATED (elly poc ay tid)
adj. The effects of a 32 channel EEG
· GUMPER (gump er)
n. The irritating person who insists you should "sit down because
you will feel better".
This next lot of words have come from an informal gathering (with wine.... in coffee cups)?
Make of them whatever you will
· SALVO (sal vo)
n. a gigantic burp
what a rock climber says when he loses his balance.
a gathering of trombone players.
But they never did decide whether a LATRANT was the sound made by Tibetan monks or a temper
tantrum thrown in or near a French latrine.....
Or whether in fact it is a small insect that crawls across your foot whilst
you are sitting on the loo